A touching tribute

So I have not posted here for a while cause I have not really had a whole lot to say. And it is a sad chain of events that brought me back to post something which I wish were not the case. By now everyone has heard about the shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary school. I had this whole long post planned about the things that really need to change in this country so this does not happen anymore. I've felt at a loss over what happened because it was children even though I am not directly a part of this tragedy. And I felt anger, sadness, and grief. And it's tough to look at the pictures of the children. And I had this whole post planned and I think it is better just to save it for another day.

I'm not a religious person by any means but when something like this happens to children, I would really like to believe that there is something out there.

And I found this touching tribute and I thought I would share it here rather than going on a rant.

Rest in Peace little children 

And Rest in Peace to your adult protectors

:-(

 

SIGGRAPH 2012 - Retrospective

So normally when I do my blog posts about SIGGRAPH I go through a rundown of all the awesome things that happened during the week.

This time I am going to do something a little different. Rather than talk about all the cool things I saw and did, I'm going to talk about the experience and what I learned this year. Because that is so much more important.

Most people who know me and know me well are aware that I am a stickler for organization and planning. I like to know exactly what is going to happen and when and where. But this year that all went out the window.

Of everything I had planned to do this year, only about 10% of it actually happened. Where as with year's past I did close to 90% of everything I had planned.

But that was not a bad thing. Because I got so much more out of just letting random things happen that I would have with the planning.

Everything is a learning experience in my eyes and this year I walked away from SIGGRAPH far more fulfilled than I did in 2010 and 2011. And it all mostly happened by chance and the unexpected. That is the real point.

What is great about SIGGRAPH is not the parties you went to or the talks you saw but the people. The friends you make and the bonds you form.

This year some of those bonds were tested, some were likely broken completely. While some grew stronger.
Some of the people I have met through SIGGRAPH may be lifelong friends. Other's may not even be there next year. Some may eventually fade as years pass. But this is how it goes.

This is what I learned this year. That nothing can be controlled. Life just has to happen and to let it happen as it is supposed to happen.

Forget all the planning, the fears of success or failure, the inhibitions, and just let go and let everything happen how it is meant to occur.  Just say to hell with it and live life.

Because for all the things I planned to do this year, it is all the things I did not plan for, all the unexpected things that I will remember the most. Those are the stories I am going to tell until the day I am no longer here.

So that is how I feel at the end of this year's SIGGRAPH. This is what I will take away from it. The experience is what matters most. And this is why this has been the best SIGGRAPH I have attended so far.

And I can't wait to go back next year. Whether or not I return as a volunteer or an attendee is a decision I have not made yet. I will cross that bridge when I come to it. But the one thing I do know is I can't wait to see my friends again and see what experiences I will have next year. And the stories to tell when it is over.

That is what I miss the most. The experience of it all and my friends (new and old) who I can only hope will find their way back.


And to end with a quote from of my favorite films and books

"stop trying to control everything and just let go"
                                                 

So until next year....

In perfect isolation here behind my wall

So this past Monday night I saw the one concert that I always wanted to see and never thought in a million years I would see. The Wall performed live in it's entirety by Roger Waters. The last time Roger Waters performed this show prior to the current tour was in 1991 not long after the Berlin Wall came down.  That show was played Potsdamer Platz in the no man's land where the Berlin Wall separated the East and West. After that show, it was thought that Roger Waters would never play The Wall again. Thankfully he has taken it back on the road and I finally got to see this show.  Now for those who don't know, Roger Waters is one of the founding members of Pink Floyd and The Wall is largely based on Water's life.


Now as fan of Pink Floyd, I have pretty much enjoyed anything they do but The Wall itself is the album to which I relate to the most as a person who suffers from a mental disorder and knows what's like to completely suffer a breakdown.


So what is The Wall all about. The Wall itself serves as a metaphor for the walls that people put up to protect themselves from emotional or mental harm from others. The story of The Wall is essentially about the disintegration of a rock star as he isolates himself in a hotel room and is driven to madness when he reflects on his life. This ultimately culminates in his total psychotic breakdown in which he envisions himself as a dictator over his audience and exacts his warped violent ideals on to his audience.


But The Wall while it does focus on one man going mad, the themes are much broader which is something that Water's himself as stressed as being about the self imposed isolation of humanity and how it leads to wars and other detestable acts of violence. The political and religious ideals that create these wars are riddled throughout the performance of The Wall and photos of the victims of all these wars were projected on individual bricks during the show. Of course The Wall was built between the audience and the stage during the course of the show. And was subsequently torn down as the show came to an end.


What was very prevalent was Water's dedication to the material and subject matter and the point he wanted to get across to the fans. That we must tear down our own walls to move forward as a species on this planet. That "fear builds walls" and that we must not succumb to those fears. The show itself ends in dramatic fashion with the audience chanting over and over "tear down the wall".


Now it goes without saying this was the most emotionally gut wrenching show I have ever seen. It starts off much like the album with a fascist rally during the song In the Flesh?

After the song, the show now takes a step backward and begins showing the character of Pink and his descent into madness. During the course of The Thin Ice, photos are shown of all the people who have been killed during the course of foreign wars.

 After this, Another Brick in the Wall Part 1 is played which deals directly with the death of Water's father during WWII. Next the show erupts with the Happiest Days of Our Lives and Another Brick in the Wall Part 2. After which this commentary on sadistic teachers (we have all had them at some point) ends, it gets quiet again during the songs Mother and Goodby Blue Sky. During the former Water's sings very poignantly "mother, should I build the wall?"


Now the show begins to focus on the next bricks in The Wall. The adultery committed by the character Pink's wife. What is noticeable about all this is that the adultery is a result of Pink's self imposed isolation.

The song Empty Spaces deals with his hurt over this and Young Lust is strange act of revenge by thinking he must be with someone else. But even his isolation cannot allow him to feel for this other person which builds into a violent outburst during the song One of my Turns. It is only during the song Don't Leave me Now that he expresses some sort of guilt, but this guilt soon turns to further cement his isolation behind this metaphorical wall. The show then erupts again with Another Brick in the Wall Part 3 in which Water's angrily sings "Don't think I need anyone at all". This is final step towards isolation and alienation. During the course of Goodbye Cruel World, there is only one brick left to place within the Wall which Water's stands behind as he painfully sings this song.

So after a brief intermission, the second half of the show starts with the band and Water's now completely separated by this large wall built across the front of the stage. The songs Hey You and Is There Anybody Out There? play with only the wall being seen by the audience and spotlights shining on them as though Water's is looking for someone to help in a last bit of desperation as he is now fully behind his wall.

During the course of Nobody Home, a small opening in The Wall reveals Water's in a mock hotel room singing about the things he has experienced and his failed attempts to escape his isolation. This then leads to the most emotional tear jerking portion of the show during the songs Vera and Bring the Boys back Home in which Water's again sings of the horrors of war and the effect it had on his life. But he puts a much more universal spin on it this time around and shows how it applies to everyone changed by war, for better or worse.


What was particularly poignant about this sequence in the show were the projections of soldiers fighting in the so called "war on terror' being reunited with their loved ones. And the plea from Water's and the audience to bring all these soldiers back home.

After this portion of the show, the focus then comes back to the central character who now lies in a comatose state after the apparent mental breakdown and building of the wall. The song Comfortably Numb focuses entirely on the attempts to revive the character and keep him "going through the show". Water's is now performing in front of The Wall as he sings the verses to the song and the music builds as the character comes around is about to begin his full descent into psychotic behavior.

It is here now that a "surrogate band' sings The Show Must Go On just before everything erupts into absolute chaos. The character now fully revived but still feeling the effects of the drugs used to bring him from his comatose state have him now hallucinating as a dictator over his audience and exacting his previously mentioned hate filled ideals on the crowd in mock fascist rally which bears striking resemblance to Nazi Germany.

This fascist portion of the show occurs during the songs In the Flesh, Run Like Hell, and Waiting for the Worms. It is during this moment of the show that Water's pulls no punches and goes for the throat. This is the point in which everything that has been building reaches it's climax and the hatred born from fear is let loose on the crowd. Water's very loudly proclaims "if I had my way, I'd have all of you shot". There is no hesitation from Water's as he sings what could be considered some of the most provocative lyrics in rock music.


As these songs reach their end, the fascist hallucination of the character is over and he now asks himself during the song Stop, 'has he been guilty all this time?" This sets up the next song The Trial in which the character puts himself on trial inside his own mind and he plays out the characters of his wife, mother, schoolmaster, prosecutor, judge and himself. Playing the role of the judge in his mind, he declares he must be "exposed before his peers" and the audience following the lead from Water's begins chanting "tear down the wall".


It is here the show culminates with the wall that was built during the course of the show being knocked down which could be best described as like a bomb going off. It was loud and dust and smoke was kicked up everywhere as the wall came down and the audience once again had view of the stage.

After this, the band and Water's stand in front of the stage as they sing the final song Outside the Wall. The fate of the character and what happened after the wall is torn down and is left intentionally unspoken. It is never stated whether his madness completely consumed him and or he recovered from his traumatic life that led to his eventual emotional collapse. But in true Water's fashion, he left some form of hope for the character and the audience with one final image of silhouette of a girl waving her arms.

So why such a long post about this?


Because other than this being the one concert that I always wanted to see, it also the best representation of this little thing we call the human condition. There are lessons to be learned from The Wall about our own humanity. That our own fear will lead to atrocities and that we must not isolate ourselves from each other. That we must genuinely care for each other and not allow ourselves to hide behind our own walls due to whatever fears we may have.

This made my day!!

So today on all the social media sites there was this vid going around made by Dreamworks animators as they prepared to attend an acting seminar.

While that vid was funny, the one they made prior was even better and one every animator can understand.
Even as a student, the shots we work on are picked apart. We get long lists of notes on everything that needs changed and so on. And let's face it, sometimes it feels a lot like nit picking...  and you may feel the need to vent your anger and frustration. Possibly through dance!

So the next time you are working on a shot and it just is not going right; watch this vid, have a good laugh and get back to your shot.

A dose of inspiration

Dreamworks is getting it right!!

Not since Tangled have I been this excited for an animated film. Heads up Pixar cause if Dreamworks keeps this up, you may not be top dog in the animation industry anymore!!

Cannot wait for this film and even further confirmation that I MUST be an animator at Dreamworks!!

quadrupeds!!!! *headdesk*

Okay so here is the blocking of my quadruped assignment. They are really hard and I'm looking forward to the end of this assignment. Give me back my bipeds!! Oh and I hate how blocking in stepped tangents looks horrible with quadrupeds no matter how good it looks in splines.

But here it is.

Watch the Weather Change

So it has been a while since I have posted anything. I have not really had much to say lately. Well, I sort of do now. I'm sure everyone in the country is aware of the massive string of tornadoes that have been bombarding the Midwest over the past week. Well today or as it is now yesterday, the weather made it's way to Indiana.

But to clarify, tornadoes are sort of treated like a joke in Indiana quite a bit. They form a lot here but they usually don't do much but every now and again a nasty one comes along and really mucks up the works.
Today there were two that completely wiped out two towns. One for each tornado. In all truth according to the current weather reports, there were total of 42 tornadoes on the ground between 2 and 5 pm.

So this is how it started from my perspective. I went to lunch break shortly after 2 and went out to my car to get a little sleep. A common practice for me since I stay up all night quite a bit. About 10 minutes into my lunch the tornado sirens went off. It was hailing and raining really bad but I thought nothing of it. After all this is Indiana. Bad weather just sort of comes with the territory. This is a state that has been known to have snow, ice, rain, thunder, lighting, tornadoes, and sunshine all within the same 24 hour time period.

I went back inside after the sirens started sounding just to see if everyone working knew what was going on. They did. I hung out for about 10 minutes and got word that a tornado south of my location was heading northeast.

Now I grew up in a family of storm chasers so I knew since it was heading northeast, it would just pass the town I was in right on by and went back to my car. It was not until I got home that I found the full extent of what happened. Two towns in Indiana were wiped out today in the Southern portion of the state.

So it would appear that the thing we generally treat with a bit of humor here came and bit us on the ass today!
It's not to say we think tornadoes are funny, but we don't generally view them as a threat because they don't amount to much in Indiana other than something that on occasion knocks over a few trees and downs some power lines.

That having been said, Indiana did not really have much of a winter this year. February which is usually our coldest month felt like early spring. And we only got snow twice which was not much. That is odd because Indiana can typically get blizzard like conditions 5 to 10 times in one winter.

So my general thought is we are going to get one hell of a tornado season. After today, it would appear it also started a few weeks earlier than usual.

But also after today, I think Indiana is probably going to see one of it's worst tornado seasons in recent history.

Only time will tell.